Help! My Child Has Been Kicked Out Of School!

2006-10-19 Word Count: 510 Category: Home & Family

The British newspapers and media have spotlighted the topic of misbehaving children in school recently. The topic of discussion usually ends with the answer that entails kicking troublemakers out of the classroom setting.

This time, however, the latest spin on this is to make the parents stay at home to look after them, once they have been thrown out of school.

It does annoy me, this kind of nonsense! At least this time there is some talk of keeping open (and maybe even building more) special schools.

After all, if the child is not getting on well in mainstream (which, since they have just been excluded, is clearly the case), then surely the answer has to be to find a type of educational environment in which the DO get on well?

This leads you to wonder what you can do as a parent if your child has been sent home from school for misbehaving. I have thought about this in detail after dealing with the very same issues with my oldest child.

1. You are not a bad parent because of this. Don't waste time feeling sorry for yourself. Maybe your parenting skills could use some improvement, but that is the true for just about everyone. Try to be a better parent by actively searching for information through books and materials on raising kids.

2. Do not blame it all on your child's school. Your school does care for your child and maybe the mishandled education of your child is due to issues beyond their boundaries like not having enough resources or inadequate teacher training.

3. DO make every representation to the local education authority (LEA) to find an alternative appropriate service for your child. Don't be aggressive, don't be rude, but do be very persistent and very insistent. If need be, see your politicians and even your newspapers.

4. DO be prepared to consider alternative placements, such as special schools or even residential placements. Better to deal with it now, than to have your child growing up with the bad behaviors!

5. DO consider the possibility of problems such as ADHD and Asperger's being at the root of the problems. The right environment makes and enourmous difference for children such as these, which is why it is crucial to find the right type of school environment.

6. Don't be tempted to look beyond your child's behavior or kid yourself into thinking that they are a model student. You may feel like defending your child and think that everyone is wrong about his behavior. It is more productive to acknowledge that there could be a problem and work it out with help from the LEA.

These are a sample of the issues you may have to deal with, so be ready to conquer them.

The six tips listed should be of some assistance to any parent coping with a child's behavior. Plus, if you work in the education arena please do not decide kicking the child out of the classroom is the best solution. That is not a productive solution and would upset all parties involved.

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Do your kids play you up? Then you should really take a look at Dr. Noel Swanson's excellent website, www.good-child-guide.com/. He also has a free newsletter on children's behavior managementthat is packed with advice.
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